When Trust Is The Only Option

No one wants to see a loved one in pain or ill. When it happens and you don't know what is wrong, it can be terrifying. Having experienced this recently, I can tell you that you will never be so grateful for the medical professionals who rush to your aid in an emergency. There is a level of trust you have to have in the EMT's that file into your home and begin work to restore breath and normal heart rhythm to your loved one. Then they whisk him away and assure you that they will take the very best care of him because you can't be there to watch over him. (Thanks, COVID!)

There are many phone calls with nurses, doctors, radiologists who are doing their level best to explain to you what is happening and you are experiencing a whirlwind of emotions all at once; shock, gratitude, anger, confusion, terror, isolation. More trust because that's my only option. After hours of waiting, you finally get a call from the neurosurgeon who has been assigned your loved one's case.

I am a note taker so I furiously scribble notes as she speaks:

ASAH, CT Scan, CTA, Interventional Radiologist. Coiling procedure, Craniotomy, Vasospasm, Hydrocephalus, Hyponatremia, Seizures, organ donation, advanced health care directives and so many more. They are confusing and frightening.

The last question, which is absolutely boggling to me, is always, "Any Questions?"

Seriously? Any questions? That's all I have and in case you are wondering, this may be the 10,000th brain aneurysm you've dealt with but it's my first and the only question I need answered right now, other than "Will my husband live through this?" is "What questions SHOULD I have?". Again, I have to trust they will tell me what I need to know.

Next set of calls are to my husband's employer. Lots of well wishes and then a string of instructions on what I need to do to set up his disability claim. Several calls need to be made to make sure that the reporting is done timely and there is no gap in receiving a paycheck. Complex and frustrating to have to make multiple calls and give the same tearful account of what has happened. I finally reach the correct HR representative and am given a number of the Short Term Disability carrier. While income replacement is the last concern I have, the conversation I had with the intake nurse was a breath of fresh air. She was empathetic and very knowledgeable about the condition I was reporting. She used layman's terms and even decoded some of the medical terminology I hadn't yet had an opportunity to google. After a few hours of having complex processes tossed my way to "figure out" and unbelievably frightening medical terms being rapid fired at me, it was a breath of fresh air to have someone interact with me on a human level. And, most importantly she imbues me with a sense of trust.

So what's the point here? I have nothing to offer you except to be kind, compassionate and patient with customers. Recognize that YOU are the expert in the products and services you offer. YOU maybe intimately familiar with the processes and have a high degree of confidence in what you will deliver but the person on the other end of the conversation may have never had to make use of the products. We use a lot of industry specific speak and acronyms that are like a foreign language. They often don't know they should have questions about next steps, timeframes, their responsibilities or what they can count on you to do. Communicate in a way that is helpful to the person with whom you are speaking which sometimes means over communicating. Remember that most consumers of our products and services will have limited interactions and thus, low levels of expertise and they need to feel they can trust you with all the little and the big things.